You know the feeling when you are still on a holiday/ vacation and think about the end and about having to say goodbye to your friends and all that and you feel a bit sad?

That’s what I’m feeling right now when thinking about next week and the drinks I organised for a few little groups I wanted to say “Cya in 2 months” too.

So that means something great right? And I, for once, am not scared about the trip. I used to be scared about doing everything I was planning, but not anymore. And that is a bit scary too, you know? But mostly I am freakishly exited!!

Not that I never did anything, I just was scared about other peoples reactions/ thoughts. But I’m passed that. I’m doing what I want and what feels right, without thinking about others. And you know what? That feels amazing 🙂

This is what my friend responded with:

Yeah I know what you mean..and being fearless could be scary but it’s ok to feel that way. It will open a new door for you, full of new opportunities because now that you are going to step out of the boundary, you will be able to do things you haven’t done before…

You are going on an adventure…Just like Bilbo 😉



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The last couple of weeks I’ve talked to some people who said something about the clothes they wear that surprised me. I have always dressed for comfort and usability. When I go to work I usually wear jeans, sneakers (or shoes/ boots I can run in) and a shirt/top, because I dress for the weather and for the need to run for the bus if  I have to. When I am on my bike I dress warm, hats, gloves, scarves and all that. I also discovered recently that it is very nice to wear some sweats over jeans while biking in the middle of the night. So I started doing that and I also don’t care going to the grocery store in my sweats, hats, no make-up and a nice comfy jacket.

This doesn’t mean I don’t have skirts and dresses and heels, I just dress for comfort and sometimes I like to dress up for an occasion.


I told a few people about that I do this and they looked at me with a question mark on their face asking “Well what if you meet mister right, or something happens and there is cute doctor/ fireman/ whatever and you’re dressed like that” and my only response was “Well mister right won’t mind what I will wear and if something happens I couldn’t care less what I’m wearing as long as they help me”. So those where some funny conversations. Also about the sweats and going outside. I really don’t care wearing sweats to the grocery store, I wear my tennis outfit when I come back from a match or training and go get food in that. I don’t really see the problem and I’m surprised that other people do.

But that’s kind of the beauty about being human right, everyone thinks differently and has different opinions. It was nice to be reminded about that especially on a small subject like this 🙂


Alternate universes: yay or nay?

Do you think there are alternate universes? I believe it could be true. That sounds like a very standard answer for every question you don’t know the answer too but I have some thoughts about it. I don’t know if they exist, cause nobody really does, but I do believe we on earth are not the only one in the Universe. The universe is huge so to say we are the only living creatures in the universe is hard to believe for me.

I think it would be amazing if there were alternate universes! Could you imagine what it would be like to live in something so completely different (like Avatar, well that was just a planet and not a different Universe but still) or so much the same (like Fringe where they cross Universes) with little differences. I don’t know if there would be a “person” like me in an other universe but it is cool to think other Universes can exist. This one is so big, there is no end (that we know of) but it is cool to think about the fact that our universe might consist in an even larger universe (Men in Black). Man that would be awesome 😀

If there are alternate Universes I would like to have a sneak peek behind the curtain just to see what’s what, how do people live there, what is life there like. Is it really so different than here or are there just minor differences? Maybe if there is a way to exchange people between other world, what could we learn from each other? I think the answers to these questions are interesting and I am dying to know the answers. Speaking of dying, what if we go to a different universe when we actually die? That’s a question I never really thought of, but that’s an interesting one as well. Do we remember which universe we came from, is that what Deja Vu is all about? They say it’s our brains trying to pull memories together from earlier experiences, but some things you never experienced and still feel like you do. Is that a glimpse in an other universe? Hmm those are some cool thoughts I will think about more, cause isn’t it fun to fantasise about things like this? I believe so 😉


Another #SPN post: Proud to be a FAN

My last post about Supernatural was more about why I watch the show. You can read that in my What is it with Supernatural post.

Today I’ll write something about the conventions and the SPNFamily.
As you all know I got hooked on the show while watching panels from a convention.

I’ve watched a couple of other shows panels and the energy they gave me wasn’t the same as Supernatural. I’ve seen ComincCon panels from Finge and The Vampire Diaries. While watching those, as much as I love those shows, I felt bored. Not that the people were bored and the information given wasn’t interesting, but for some reason they didn’t feel as connected with each other as the SPN cast and crew.

No matter who is on the show and at a Supernatural convention, they all feel like family. They all immensely respect each other and treat each other the same. Of course there’s teasing on and off set, but there’s s much respect between them all. If you look at a Jensen and Ty panel in JibCon2013 (Jared unfortunately had to leave early because of an family emergency), I think it was the Sunday panel, Ty tell the story about (I think it was this) how Jensen asked the crew to ask Ty if he wanted to start with his lines or with Jensens.

Ty told everyone that he never ever had that question asked when he was on an other set. He’s been on so many TV-shows but this was actually the first time a main character asked him something like that. I don’t really remember what he told us, but it was in line of what I just wrote. THe story I talked about starts at 29 minutes, the rest is awesome as well though 😉

When watching Jensen and Jared’s (J2) panels the only thing you can do is laugh. They are so funny, well all the panels are but still, but they can also be serious. They try to answer the question as honest and correct as they can, even though they must have heard some of these questions a million times. They still respect the person asking the question and are as nice as always. Sometimes when they are starting to answer the question it takes a different course, but in the end they try to answer it. As a fan you can expect loads of humor on conventions, but also so much respect. Every time J2 have to leave they tell the fans thank you and that they love seeing them/us (I haven’t been yet) and even though they don’t see their families a lot they do take time for the fans (family). They really show appreciation towards the fans and all the actors/ crew that make this how possible.

Actors that portrayed only a small role on SPN, and are at a convention, turn into family as well. Richard Spade and Sebastian Roche both had an impact on thee show with their characters, and just because they aren’t in the show any longer, they’re still at conventions and they still have a big impact on the rest of the crew. They are as much part of the SPN Family as the main characters are and that’s shown at all conventions they go to.

It is so funny that there are so many people who don’t know Supernatural. Everyone I meet and tell them about the best show ever look at my with questioned eyes that tell me “you’re crazy”. Most of them don’t know the show and if they hear the name is Supernatural they think it’s a show about “the supernatural”. Which it is not! What it is about you can also read in my other blog. The short version is it’s a show about two brothers and their bond, what they go through and how they connect. Besides that it’s a show about hunting the supernatural 😉
The fact that only SPN fans know about GISHWHES (Greatest Scavenger Hunt the World has Ever Seen) says a lot. While being active in the hunt you realise there’s so many fans worldwide. I realised that on Twitter. Before GISHWHES I had about 100 followers, now I have over 300 (and that’s only because of GISHWHES). When you see another GISHWHES post on Twitter and look at the profile, you’ll notice that most of these profiles are SPN fans.

SPN fans also listen to the same music. Take Jason Manns for example. When you have a ticket for a Jason Manns StageIt (online concert for the fans: show and ask who is a SPN fan, you’ll get the reaction “You can better ask who isn’t”. This is kinda cool, cause while being a fan of the show you also get introduced to other great artists.

I’ve noticed that when you aks something in a SPN Facebook group or on Twitter, you get the nicest and most honest answers from the fans. They support the show but also each other. Doesn’t matter if you live across the world, if you need something they will give it to you. And that’s why I am proud to be a member of the SPN Family! 😀

Problem solving through NLP and Sensi

There’s two types of therapies that can change your train of thought, the way you think, that I recently discovered. There are probably a lot more but these two are pretty interesting. I love the way they work, it’s kind of magic 😀

So let me explain the two different techniques, which some people say are therapies. Depending on your definition of therapy, these two aren’t psychology therapies, but they are help full and will change your mind, for some curious reason.

NLP = Neural Linguistic Programming. If you’re having trouble with something in your live, the way you think about it and if you want to change the way you think about that you can schedule an appointment. After that appointment your train of thought is changed. First you picture the problem and after that you create the way you want to act (direct your own film about the situation exactly how you want it, the sound/ colors/ smell etcetera). You will picture the outcome before you and if you got that you’ll repeat it faster and faster until it goes to fast. At that point the programmer will put an anchor on your body, hand, face, which ever you prefer or is a good place for you. When the program is done you’ll notice the difference right away. Also when you get to that specific situation, or a similar, you just press that anchor and the good feeling comes up and you won’t make an issue about it any more. I swear this works, which is pretty awesome!

Sensi therapy uses the meridian structure of the body to find blockages in feelings. Each meridian is connected with an organ. Depending on which meridian hurts they can tell what the feeling is that is blocked. The therapist will massage that spot and after that the pain must be less than it was. These pains can contain old feelings which are still in the body. Even if you don’t feel like that anymore, you can still have rest feelings in your body. This also works like magic 😉
Next to the sensi these therapists can use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) which is a bit like NLP. It’s a different technique, cause they will press different parts of your hand and face in a pattern while you speak a line in which you’ll repeat until the pattern is complete. You’ll repeat this pattern a couple of times, sing a line of a song and count till 5. After that you’ve changed your thoughts about that specific “problem”. Your feelings are also changed about that specific problem, which is great.

There were a couple of problems I had before going into NLP or EFT. I won’t go into details, cause their a bit private. I can tell you however that my thoughts about those problems are completely changed and my feelings are a lot lighter about those things. The “pain” of those problems are either solved or a lot less, so that’s a good thing.

Some people might not believe in these sort of therapies, but I would advice you, if you have problems with co-workers/ family/ friends or other personal problems that you try one or the other, cause it’ll blow your mind. I believe in energy surrounding us and positive vibes and that when you loose those it can make your live harder than it should be. These therapies (if you’d call them therapies) can help you so much and the good thing about it is that you only need 1 or 2 consults, depending on the size of the problem. You’ll also realise that the problems you have are all connected and if you start solving one, some others will be solved automatically, or other problems will rise inside you that will be able to be solved. Some problems you never you had come across, and even though you don’t know you have them it’ll make sense to you and you won’t be surprised about them. I know I wasn’t surprised at all about upcoming problems.

I think these are great techniques for correcting your train of thought and I also think that everybody should at least try one of these, cause let’s be realistic, everybody has problems that needs to be solved. Some bigger than others but most are just thoughts that need to be corrected 😀

I’d advise people wanted to try these to go in completely blank and don’t have any thoughts about it, cause than it works great and it’ll look like magic 😉

Perfect summer day

Yesterday, June 29, was a perfect day. Me and a girl friend of mine went to the beach as we try to do more often. Finally the weather was good enough to go, even though I would’ve gone if the weather wasn’t good.

Yesterday we went to Bergen and Bergen aan Zee. Bergen is a little town in North – Holland (province in The Netherlands) and next to it is a beach town called Bergen aan Zee.

As we don’t see each other a lot we always have some catching up to do. But we mostly just hang, and do our own thing. We hang out, be our own crazy selfs and just enjoy all of it.

We went to Bergen for a little shopping and a stroll over the Saturday market and then to the sea. After a few mishaps we run into while trying to park we finally were able to sit at a beach club and order something to drink. The wind was chilly but behind glass the temperature was great.

We talked some and than my friend decided she wanted to have a walk on the beach. Like always we do that separately (well I haven’t done any walking yet, I just relax at the club, have a drink and enjoy the sun :))
Before she went for a walk I decided to go to the restroom, that’s where this day got interesting and a lot more fun.
There was this elderly lady who began talking to me when she saw that I have a tattoo. She told me that her daughter (in her 50s) wanted one and that she would give it to her when she made up her mind of what kind of tattoo she wanted to have. Than she asked me if there was any meaning to my tattoo and I explained. I told her I got my tattoo because I needed to get more courage (grow some balls as we put it in Dutch) and just do the things I want and not constantly thinking about what other people might thing about me. I told her I had to suck it up and just be brave. The tattoo I got was already drawn out but I adjusted it to fit me. Now it’s something that fits me perfectly (as one of my best friends told me when I showed her). The lady thought that was great and we talked about some other stuff and when I laughed she told me I have such a beautiful smile and that I was a beautiful girl. When she asked me if I had a boyfriend I said no, than she asked me if I had a girlfriend and after I said no she asked me if I wanted to be her girlfriend just as a joke. That made me laugh even more. I thanked her about the compliment and we parted ways (Love that saying b.t.w ;)).

When my friend was on her walk and I was listening to some music while having a tea and enjoying the sun the lady came up to me cause they’re leaving. She told me to enjoy my holiday (which I wasn’t even on, but still) and that the loved me saying “I had to grow some balls” and she said “You have them girl!” That was awesome, I won’t forget that in a while. I don’t wanna forget either cause that was great.

When we were driving back home I played my new favorite Bon Jovi songs on repeat (and it’s only a couple of song so we hear them a lot) and my friend just kept laughing when I turned up the volume, again, and just started to sing a long. I know I’m crazy and I love that I can be as weird as I am with her. She loved it too though. She told me that it was awesome that I can be so excited about new songs, being a fan (and paying for golden tickets for a Bon Jovi concert or going to a Supernatural convention in the future), and I told her it’s because I just started to feel alive. I haven’t felt I was alive for over 23 years, I think (read this story to find out why). I started living at 23 so I have a lot to catch up on and this is how I do that. I just do what I like and what I want and don’t take no for an answer.

I know I am weird and different and that I like what most people I know don’t like, but I’m finally at that point where I can just say “Fuck it! I don’t care! I like what I like and you like what you like and that’s okay”. I love that all the people around me are different, they all like different things and that’s what makes my life so amazing at this moment.

To all my friends, whether in Holland or not, I love you all and thank you for being in my life. You are amazing!

Lots of love and hugs – Ilse