So I’m sitting here in Austin as my second week of the summer vacation is about to start and I’m having this incredible realization. I’ve been here for a week, house and dog sitting my friends house and dogs (obviously 🙂 ). They took me to a couple of places before they left for Europe and after that I felt like I fell in a hole.
Last year I picked Austin as a city I would like to live in, even though I haven’t been there yet, all these signs about Austin kept coming up and finally I decided I wanted to move here. I didn’t have or wanted to make rush plans and just let it sink in. A few months ago my colleague told me her mom was going on a Europe trip with them and they would probably wanted someone to take care of their house and their dogs. I’d happily said yes. And now I’m here and I love the weather, yesterday we had some Houston weather (which meant more humidity than normal here in Austin) but overall I like it. Yes it gets hot, it gets really hot, but it’s not the hotness of not being able to breath anymore.
I figured that when I move here I’d be indoors most of these hot days anyways, cause I’d probably have to work here too 🙂 I think the hottest hours are from 11.00 – 17.00, which usually means it’s between business ours and in the weekends there’s a ton of places to cool of, like lakes and pools and oh yeah airconditioned houses 😛
Back to that whole hole falling episode. My friends took me out to a couple of places and the moment I was alone I didn’t know what to do. I was kind of afraid of getting out of the house. Why? I don’t know! Maybe because I had to “defrost” and just getting used to the fact that I’m actually here. I loved the places my friends took me too and I went out to the store for some groceries and to the movies (which is always a huge safe haven for me). I got online and RSVP’ed to MeetUp events and I did a Yoga class. After that class I felt a lot better. The atmosphere there was great, it was a good sweat!
The day after however I felt the same. It felt like I had to do more. I told a lot of people I was going to the place I want to live and I felt pressure (which I put onto myself, let’s be honest about that) to fill my days up with exploring Austin. Cause I felt like I had to have stories when I’d come back to Holland. I also asked myself these funny questions like: “but where are you gonna eat” or “where are you going to park” and that made the “fear” and doubt greater. It is a bit overwhelming figuring out what to do without having someone else with me. I usually don’t plan on holidays, I want to relax and if the friend who’s with me has plans or wants to do stuff I just tag along. I don’t need much.
I called one of my friends the other day and she asked me what’s wrong with not doing anything? I honestly couldn’t tell her… I don’t care if people have an active vacation or a vacation they just hang at the beach and relax. So why do have to do stuff? Don’t know. I’ve been around, driving bits and I loved it. I took the DuckTour yesterday and I ate on 6th Street in de Bikini bar, which was amazing. I experienced the traffic here and I know I can handle that too. I love how green it is here, there’s so many trees, there’s lakes and the river so I don’t have anything to complain about. She also told me, very wise that friend of mine, part of moving to a new city is experiencing it and figuring out what’s there. That’s part of the fun of moving and living in a new city. I don’t have to know everything about it, I just have to know if it feels right.
I want to relax when I’m on a vacation and I don’t want the pressure of having to do anything. And that’s something I realized today. I am here in the amazing garden, sitting in the shade, listening to birds and crickets and I’m relaxed. Yes I am to experience Austin, but part of that is also being able to be here with just me and be okay with just being me and with me.
I got a couple of things plans for the next coming days and I’d like to go to the beach next week. I don’t have too much planned for this week, but that’s okay cause I still got 3 weeks left and I can do whatever I want. I don’t need to come back with huge stories, I want to come back relaxed and really for whatever comes next in my life. If it’s moving to Austin, I don’t know, but I do know I can live here. It feels good and that’s basically all I wanted to know, so it’s safe to say: Mission Accomplished 😀